I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize