You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
