his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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