At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
