I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize