You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
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