i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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