she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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