hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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