I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
