feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
