Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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