from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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