we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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