its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize