i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe