So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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