do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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