Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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