I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
