im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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