Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I wish they made helmets for livers.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
