It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
