p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
