When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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