Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You may now shotgun with the bride
We are all done wearing pants today
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
