Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize