none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
