just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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