I'm lost and stupid without you.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
