But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
