I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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