My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
