apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
