just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
My dick has a subreddit
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Please don't give away my fajitas
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