We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
