So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
we're so committed to being not committed
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
