I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I am mentally ready for anal.
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