so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
