I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
