hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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