then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize