spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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