Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
