I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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