yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
