There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize
