Taylor Swift is so right about you.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
