How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Randomize