Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
